Dad Jokes - show us what you got - only rule is you have to laugh while sharing

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  • Dad Jokes - show us what you got - only rule is you have to laugh while sharing

    A dad joke is a short joke, typically a pun, presented as a one-liner or a question and answer, but not a narrative. Generally inoffensive, dad jokes are stereotypically told by fathers among family, either with sincere humorous intent, or to intentionally provoke a negative reaction to its overly-simplistic humour.

    Many dad jokes may be considered
    anti-jokes, deriving humour from an intentionally unfunny punchline. An example dad jokes goes as follows: A child will say to the father, "I'm hungry," to which the father will reply, "Hi, Hungry, I'm Dad."


    ...edit and the best ones are the ones that embarrass the kids
    Last edited by danandria; 03-02-2020, 08:51 PM.

  • #2
    Why couldn't the motorbike get up the hill?

    It was two tyred.

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    • #3
      Whaddaya call a blind buck?

      No eye deer....

      Comment


      • #4
        A Battery walks into a bar, the bar tender turns to him and says dont try starting anything mate.
        Go hard or Go home.

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        • #5
          Dad - What shall we name the dog ? ( a female puppy )

          Kids - We dont know..

          Dad - Batman !

          Mum - Dick !

          4yr old - Yeah Batman !

          Dad - No your Mum is right, lets name it Dick !

          True story,
          Why did the Dad get into trouble ?
          I was laughing at the time.


          The TRUTH is out there,
          the Aliens think its a great joke on us.
          We still believe in Santa, but eat the Easter Bunny

          And the Easter Bunny tastes SO GOOD !!
          That's why he is made of Chocolate.

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          • #6

            Heres an original from 2018...
            Click image for larger version

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            • #7
              Click image for larger version

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              "If we meet offline and you look nothing like your Pics...You are buying me drinks until you do!"

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              • #8
                If you get an email telling you that you can catch swine flu from tins of ham you should delete it. It's spam.

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                • #9
                  I have been asked what my wife does for a living....

                  Pretty hard to say, really.

                  Because she sells seashells by the sea shore.

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                  • #10
                    Click image for larger version

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                    "If we meet offline and you look nothing like your Pics...You are buying me drinks until you do!"

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                    • #11
                      Hi honey, have you missed me?

                      With every bullet I fired so far.
                      (... as you duck for cover)
                      If you're going through hell, keep going."
                      Winston Churchill

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                      • #12
                        Click image for larger version

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                        "If we meet offline and you look nothing like your Pics...You are buying me drinks until you do!"

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                        • #13

                          Sandwich walks into a bar - Barman says : "Sorry , we don't serve food in here"

                          Two peanuts walk into a bar - one was a salted

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                          • #14
                            grasshopper goes into a bar - barman says, 'hey we have a drink named after you', grasshopper replies 'what, Eric?'

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                            • #15
                              A brown bear walks into a bar and orders a beer.
                              The bartender says, "We don't serve brown bears at the Back Bar of the Beef and Bourbon Burger Bar and Grill."
                              The bear gets annoyed, grabs another patron by the hair, smashes his face into the bar, and says "I want a beer!"
                              The bartender says, "No. I told you we don't serve brown bears at the Back Bar of the Beer and Bourbon Burger Bar and Grill."
                              The bear gets really angry, steps back and take a huge bite out of the bar, and growls "Give me a beer!"
                              The bartender replies, "No, I told you already, we don't serve brown bears at the back bar of the Beer and Bourbon Burger Bar and Grill. Besides, you'll have to leave anyway as you're clearly on drugs"
                              "What drugs??" the bear replies, "What are you talking about??"
                              The bartender replies, " ... that bar bit you ate!"

                              Comment

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